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'In God's Hands?' Louisiana House To Vote On Allowing Guns In Churches
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Louisiana state Rep. Henry Burns (R) has introduced a bill in the Louisiana House that would allow churches to institute a "security plan" enabling congregants with concealed weapons permits to carry guns into churches and temples.
According to a Burns spokesperson, "we buy fire extinguishers in case there's a fire," and allowing churchgoers to carry concealed is just the "final stage of security" for places of worship.
House Bill 68 would allow a church or temple to authorize an unlimited number of congregation members to bring their guns into church, according to the individual church's own guidelines.
Burns' spokesperson Dodie Horton told TPM that the bill is "limited in scope" and "all about choice." Church leaders could elect to "implement a security plan by using members of their church" who have permits to carry concealed, or they could opt out and not allow guns in at all. She added that even in churches that are part of the security plan, "if someone who is not part of that security plan comes into the church with a gun, they're still breaking the law."
"God gives us locks on our doors," said Horton, adding: "We buy fire extinguishers in case there's a fire." This bill would simply offer a "final stage of security" for those churches that choose it.
"It's a security plan, not a free-for-all gun shoot," said Horton.
When asked if Burns believes he has the votes to pass the bill in the state House, Horton replied that Arkansas has passed a similar bill, but "it's all in God's hands."
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hoppycalif2
May 4, 2010 3:06 PM
I think this is a great idea. Who can say that it isn't possible that a day will come when an Arab fellow in a long white robe will walk into a church and insist that a person's skin color isn't important? It might just be necessary to shoot that Arab just to be sure the congregation can keep following Jesus's words.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 3:19 PM in reply to hoppycalif2
So, they are pro-choice. This is good. God bless them.
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chameleon
May 4, 2010 6:23 PM in reply to Effin Rightman
As long as it's not a woman who wants an abortion
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 3:39 PM in reply to hoppycalif2
The Law of Unintended Consequences:
Bring Your Guns to Church Edition
After choosing an evangelical church in Louisiana as the kick-off site of His long-awaited comeback tour, the second coming does not come off quite as advertised. The Lord, in fact, ends up dead as a boot (again), courtesy of a well-armed, but well-meaning, parishioner.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 3:51 PM in reply to tiowally
"I thought he was one of them hippies, I guarantee," said Justin Hebert, who fired the fatal shot from a kneeling position. His cousin, Batiste fired the first shot, but he missed and hit the Breaux twins. "It's OK," said Calvin, "them Breaux boys been runnin' my traps anyhow. Good riddance. Shame about Jesus, though. OK, let's get a beer, no? Alon avec moi, bon temps roulet."
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 4:05 PM in reply to Effin Rightman
"It was the work of the Holy Spirit," Pastor A. Watt dePhuque told the Times-Picayune. "Had it not been for keen marksmanship of Brother Justin there's no telling how many others might have been hurt. It was pure providence that he was there. What else can I say: Praise the Lord and pass the snakes!"
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 4:14 PM in reply to tiowally
"And after we plays wit dem snakes, I gonna skin 'em and trow 'em in de gumbo fo sure," said Sister Tee Tee Boudreaux. "Jesus, dat some good yeah! Come ta tinks, I gives some to Jesus wit da extra hot sauce, maybe he resurrect one mo times."
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 4:41 PM in reply to Effin Rightman
You know, i respect a lot of what the two of you say on here, but this exchange really feels like you're putting on a minstrel show. Not impressive.
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 5:11 PM in reply to cole_dranx
Jesus has just been shot dead ... and you're calling it a minstrel show?
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farnsworth
May 4, 2010 5:42 PM in reply to cole_dranx
It is making fun of people in Louisiana. With a quite authentic representation of the accent. Most of the people who talk like that would be very annoyed with you for implying that they were speaking like black people.
Your use of the term "minstrel show" is misguided at best.
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 6:39 PM in reply to farnsworth
I'm basing my take on my own experience growing up in Louisiana, and I strongly disagree with a few of your assertions. There's no one accent, and none of them sound like this. Except Uncle Remus. Besides, the gun-nut who proposed this legislation is from the northwest of the state, which means his constituents are most likely to talk like Dale Gribble or Johnny Cash.
For that matter, race is trickier than you're implying too. There's a lot of class mixed up in it (though really that's true everwhere in this country), and it really does depend where in the state, and which culture group, you're in.
Case in point, I've heard from Creole friends that their parents or grandparents had to sneak around if they wanted to date "black" people (Anglo-African American, rather than French-speaking and of African descent). On the other hand, I know one Cajun family friend who used to say he couldn't talk smack about any black folks growing up, due to the likelihood they were actually cousins.
So - my use of the term "minstrel show" was intentional, insofar as the depiction seemed overly broad, intellectually reductive, and felt less concerned with accurately satirizing the culture at hand than with denigrating the culture out of hand. I stand by my assertion, though I want to make clear that I think the part where they gun-nuts mistakenly shoot the Second Coming of Christ is spot-on.
Rednecks would totally shoot the Second Coming of Christ right in his grill.
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 7:31 PM in reply to cole_dranx
I grew up in South Louisiana, and the accent is pretty much spot on. At the same time, I don't disagree with your observations. Cajuns and blacks have always mixed and that jambalaya produced some of the prettiest, funniest women I have ever known. You are especially right that North Louisiana is the real redneck territory. South Louisiana is much more liberal, thank God.
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chameleon
May 4, 2010 7:47 PM in reply to Brownbagger
I agree, the more mixed up the better. Makes for beautiful children and a better world. Good to see you BrownBagger. All is well?
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 8:01 PM in reply to chameleon
Qui, mon ami. Wouldn't mind having an Abita or two with you as well. As Effin said, alon avec moi, bon temps roulet. And bring Marinus, too. I'm buying. ;-)
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chameleon
May 4, 2010 8:06 PM in reply to Brownbagger
I''ve never had an Abita - but I am getting very thirsty just thinking about it. Good to see you again. Still no Lars. I wonder what happened. Even if he were just busy I am sure he would find the time to stop in and say hello. He has to know we must be wondering about him. If I belonged to Facebook I'd check out his page, but I don't.
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Voodoo Woman
May 4, 2010 5:58 PM in reply to cole_dranx
With respect, what form of ridicule would you think appropriate for a state, my state, seriously considerng guns in churches?
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 6:41 PM in reply to Voodoo Woman
Your state is mine, and in the case (as in many others) worthy of ridicule. But I'd like to see the specific stupidity targeted, rather than "they talk funny, and are stupid."
To borrow a metaphor from the weaponry-loving brothers, I'd prefer a rifle shot to a shotgun blast.
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 7:53 PM in reply to cole_dranx
Cousins, not brothers. Too bad we can't grab a couple of Abitas and argue this silliness face to face mon ami. ;-)
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 7:55 PM in reply to Brownbagger
And you are invited too, Voodoo. One for the road? Maybe two?
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 8:55 PM in reply to Brownbagger
Ca ce'st un dommage que nous pouvons pas - you're a strong voice for good around these parts, and I'd look forward to hearing your perspective.
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 9:17 PM in reply to cole_dranx
Vous etes tres aimable.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 6:36 PM in reply to cole_dranx
Thanks for your kind words. A person is curious about your objection. Is it on a religious or a South Louisiana basis?
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 5:05 PM in reply to Effin Rightman
Just as Sister Tee Tee was about to fetch hot sauce, the church was filled with a brilliant white light.
"What the hay-ll's dat!" Pastor dePhuque exclaimed. "What the hay-ll's dat!" the congregation replied.
"Soy yo," sayeth the Light. "¡Y estoy cabreado! Has matado a mi hijo unigénito de nuevo."*
"What da hay-ll's dat mean?" Pastor dePhuque wondered, as Brother Justin wheeled around hoping to get a clear shot at the unseeable, unknowable, yet highly credit-rated target. "Where he be? Where he be?" Brother Justin, now whirling like a dervish and aiming wildly, screamed.
*"It's me," sayeth the Light. "And I'm pissed! You killed my only son again."
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 5:13 PM in reply to tiowally
Somewhere a dog barked.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 5:49 PM in reply to tiowally
"Who dat?" asked Tee Tee.
"You mean da dog, or da light?" Justin replied.
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minnesconsin
May 4, 2010 5:36 PM in reply to tiowally
LOL! +1
Only way it could be funnier is if they killed His Daughter this time...
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 5:40 PM in reply to minnesconsin
That minstrel show has already been done. It was called Godfather III.
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The Commenter Formerly Known as NCSteve
May 4, 2010 5:27 PM in reply to Effin Rightman
Well, they had to, didn't they? I mean, it was a Christian church and this Jewboy just walked in like he owned the place or somthin'.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 9:33 PM in reply to The Commenter Formerly Known as NCSteve
Hardly a boy. He's well over 2,000 now. Still, he's a pisher compared to our other messiahs.
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Cornelius
May 5, 2010 11:15 AM in reply to tiowally
Dead you say! Ha, he'll be back in three days. Better start repentin' NOW.
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NobodyCouldHavePredicted
May 5, 2010 10:14 AM in reply to hoppycalif2
That Arab, fella, did he come into town on a donkey...? Palm fronds 'n all the crap?
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hoppycalif2
May 5, 2010 12:24 PM in reply to NobodyCouldHavePredicted
I understood he arrived on a Harley, and stood out only because of the white robe and a strange glow around his head - possibly an LED device providing the glow?
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Powkat
May 4, 2010 3:14 PM
Okay, it is official, this country is totally, unquestionably, absolutely bat crap crazy.
So much for that 'turn the other cheek' garbage, huh?
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Dave Adams
May 4, 2010 8:59 PM in reply to Powkat
"Turn the other cheek" is out-of-fate. It's now "fire the other barrel".
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political_observer
May 4, 2010 3:23 PM
LMAO....Who would Jesus shoot? I bet they don't see the irony in this. If you believe in a 'God' who's not strong enough to protect you while you are worshipping him/it/her, then you've got a bigger problem on your hands and your guns can't help you.
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eekahil
May 4, 2010 3:27 PM
Hey Burns - you are gonna be cool about Mosque-goers getting to "carry concealed"?
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Riesz Fischer
May 4, 2010 4:05 PM in reply to eekahil
It says "churches and temples". I don't think it includes mosques.
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elkins
May 4, 2010 5:25 PM in reply to Riesz Fischer
we wouldn't want guns in mosques. This is beyond ridiculous. I can't believe it is 2010 and we're acting like this
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Dimensio
May 4, 2010 6:46 PM in reply to Riesz Fischer
In fact, mosques are specifically included within the text of House Bill 68. Houses of worship other than churches, temples and mosques are also included through the text "or other similar place of worship".
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Hank
May 4, 2010 4:12 PM
I think the first concealed weapon vote in all states should be for the State House, Senate, and Capitol buildings. If those pass, then they can feel free to allow it anywhere. If they are unwilling to allow it in their house, then they have no moral standing to allow it anywhere else.
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Sniffit
May 4, 2010 4:17 PM
Huh. Theig god gave them locks on their doors but forgot to give them common sense? Their god is a retard.
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Vincent F
May 4, 2010 4:22 PM
God didn't give me a lock for my door, I had to buy it at Home Depot. Why doesn't God advertise the lock give-away program? By the way, that sounds very socialist to me!
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Quitty
May 4, 2010 5:33 PM in reply to Vincent F
That's what I thought! I kicked my boyfriend out and went and bought new locks at the hardware store. I wish someone had told me that God gives us locks on our doors -- would've saved me a few bucks!
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minnesconsin
May 4, 2010 5:47 PM in reply to Vincent F
Because I'm guessing it's not His program, at least as of the New Testament. It's a little inconsistent with His message.
Let's see - keeping people out, heaping loads of fear, threatening and killing - I think that's Someone Else's program.
Hope you guess my name? But what's puzzling you is the nature of my game...
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bluesplashy
May 4, 2010 6:55 PM in reply to minnesconsin
hmmmm.... yesssss!
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 9:41 PM in reply to minnesconsin
Hi, minnesconsin, let me introduce myself ...
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 4:45 PM
This guy is from the 9th District, which is to say Bossier. You may recall Bossier from such other recent Louisiana-related TPM stories as this one, wherein the country sheriff convinces middle-aged dudes to battle the Islamist threat via the martial art of Jazzercise:
http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/03/sheriffs_office_cites_islamic_terror_cells_in_boss.php
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tiowally
May 4, 2010 5:21 PM in reply to cole_dranx
Related Link (Official Theme Song)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=de2vnEkFZM8
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 5:42 PM in reply to tiowally
Nice - the German subtitles add a bit of flair.
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Effin Rightman
May 4, 2010 9:45 PM in reply to cole_dranx
LOL. Mazltov.
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Cornelius
May 5, 2010 11:24 AM in reply to cole_dranx
A classic. Was there early and laughed all day! TY for finding it.
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Cornelius
May 5, 2010 11:27 AM in reply to Cornelius
Was sisterkevin back then. Trouble keeping up with all my identities.
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fortunatolucchesi
May 4, 2010 5:25 PM
Why do these people ever leave their homes if they're so terrified of everything? I don't think it's the greatest idea for a state of a country to have large numbers of paranoid schizophrenics running around with loaded firearms. If they want to protect their homes, fine. If they don't feel safe in church, stay home and pray.
Sheesh!
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The Commenter Formerly Known as NCSteve
May 4, 2010 5:31 PM
Brilliant. There's simply no good reason whey they shouldn't have the right and capability to quickly escalate every little doctrinal dispute within a congregation into a reenactment of the Thirty Years War. What better way to sort out which side of the argument is God's side?
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Brownbagger
May 4, 2010 10:21 PM in reply to The Commenter Formerly Known as NCSteve
Actually, I'm beginning to see an upside to this. I'm sure Christopher Hitchens would agree.
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Bloggin
May 4, 2010 5:35 PM
It seems the smaller the penis, the lower the self esteem, the less educated, the more insecure and in fear of their world, the more he will be obsessed with the need to carry a gun.
But has anyone noticed the hypocrisy here? For instance, the Pope rides around in a bullet proof box, and now churches want to arm themselves with guns. What are they afraid of?????
Isn't the point of the 'religion' concept, to be able to go to this wonderful place called 'heaven' when you die? So why are all the religious leaders and their followers doing anything they can NOT to go?
It seems like 'Fake Faith' only works up to the point where fear takes over.
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Falstaff
May 4, 2010 5:39 PM
Luckily, they still insist on non-alcoholic blood of Christ.
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cole_dranx
May 4, 2010 5:50 PM in reply to Falstaff
you know louisiana's got a fair number of catholics too right?
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Egypt Steve
May 4, 2010 5:44 PM
Matthew 26:52: Jesus said, "Put your sword back into its place. All who take up the sword will die by the sword."
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mycomment
May 4, 2010 5:50 PM
oh, sweet jesus, i can't wait for the shootout at the holy roller church of the nimrods.
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Mooser
May 4, 2010 5:50 PM
Screw those swords! There is a bomb in Gilead! Let's use that instead.
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morriganinoregon
May 4, 2010 6:59 PM in reply to Mooser
buawww haaa haaaa, my co-worker had to come over to see what was 'wrong with me' I was choking back laughter and tears so hard. He thought I was having a heart attack!
whew. . that was a good one, Mooser!
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Libertyluvrz
May 4, 2010 7:44 PM in reply to Mooser
Fanned for excellent wit!
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latichever
May 4, 2010 5:53 PM
I am sure this was enacted because they were concerned about people murdering churchgoing physicians who do legal abortions, as was the case with George Tiller.
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NobleCommentDecider
May 4, 2010 5:57 PM
Juss dont arm the Niggahs!
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OhioGuy
May 4, 2010 6:03 PM
What the hell is going on in our country that people would even want to take their guns to church?
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MollyNYC
May 4, 2010 6:04 PM
You ever get the impression that at some point, the strategy to get America's Southerners in the GOP shifted to their going after America's complete idiots?
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latichever
May 4, 2010 6:07 PM
"You ever get the impression that at some point, the strategy to get America's Southerners in the GOP shifted to their going after America's complete idiots?"
And the difference is?
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eve
May 4, 2010 6:46 PM in reply to latichever
As a very liberal Southerner I resent your bigotry.
Yeah, we have our fair share of looney tunes, but so does every other state.
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glblank
May 4, 2010 7:23 PM in reply to eve
Agreed. Here in WI, we still prohibit conceal/carry and Retugs are just itching to get both houses and gov seat to get that on the agenda. Alot of the gunnies here are just as fucked-up.
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Decatur Dem
May 4, 2010 6:31 PM
Another good reason to stay out of churches.
Oh, and latichever: back off. I don't know where you live, and don't care, but wherever it is I guarantee there's a generous supply of idiots there. No offense- they're everywhere, not just here in the South. And there are also good, kind-hearted souls as well.
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hoppycalif2
May 4, 2010 8:56 PM in reply to Decatur Dem
May I be the first to suggest that those goodhearted kind folks vote for a change?
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smallhandff
May 4, 2010 6:32 PM
The Catholic clergy is chock-full of unadjudicated pedophiles & now the congregants come to services locked n loaded? The Archbishops of Little Rock & New Orleans should be incontinent with fright. Then again, think of the $$$$ saved over lawsuits that no longer need settlement. Praise Jesus.
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Dimensio
May 4, 2010 6:42 PM
I am curious as to why the state of Louisiana currently prohibits the possession of firearms within houses of worship even by individuals legally permitted to carry firearms when in public. Should not such policy be established by the individual churches, and not by the state government?
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eve
May 4, 2010 6:49 PM in reply to Dimensio
Not sure -- but I think it is up to the churches. If I understand correctly, prior to this law (if it passes) no one licensed to carry could take a gun into a church even if it was okay with the church.
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Dimensio
May 4, 2010 6:56 PM in reply to eve
You are correct; at present, R.S. 40:1379.3 explicitly prohibits the possession of concealed deadly weapons within "Any church, synagogue, mosque or similar place of worship".
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bluesplashy
May 4, 2010 7:08 PM
Taking concealed guns to church. I guess that is the "new christian". I still like the idea that they be allowed to carry guns into congresses - both federal and state.
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glblank
May 4, 2010 7:19 PM
How long ago was it that some pro gun Tard walked into a UU churchin TN and killed a parishioner who prevented the Tard from shooting others. Nimrods, Retards and Ass Suckers unite!
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Libertyluvrz
May 4, 2010 7:50 PM
Can't wait for the first time that a bunch of militia members take refuge in a church.
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DP1
May 4, 2010 8:38 PM
Great bill, because, you know, we all need to have a little gun with our God. They go great together.
Why the frack don't lawmakers introduce legislation to create jobs and increase wages and shit that actually makes a difference in everyday people's lives?
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DoubleFelix
May 4, 2010 9:19 PM
Take me now, lord.
I'm in favor of making guns MANDATORY for all church-goers. Put the crazies all in the same room with guns and let Darwin take it from there.
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Leftflank
May 4, 2010 11:11 PM
It could make tithing much more interesting. Like, give 10% or die. That part of the wedding vow where they say "does anyone have any objections" might get pretty interesting too.
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mjeffn
May 5, 2010 1:53 AM
What are they so threatened by, losing their lives to the rapture?
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mjeffn
May 5, 2010 1:57 AM
Turn the other cheek and, fire!
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Tres
May 5, 2010 10:06 AM
So, then, that would also include mosques. Good luck with that next time you're campaigning, Burns. The attack ad writes itself, "Henry Burns introduced a bill that would allow jihadis the right to carry concealed weapons into their mosques....Worng on terrorism, wrong for Louisiana...."
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jacks45
May 5, 2010 11:02 AM
When I first moved to Houston in the early '70's I remember being shocked at the sight of a pick-up truck with a gun rack on Memorial Drive with two bumper stickers. One said: No hope without Jesus. The other said: Quit honking I'm reloading.
I left Texas when the Lone Star State passed it's own concealed carry law. Yeah, I'm a coward.
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bluestatedon
May 8, 2010 12:09 PM
I don't know what the big deal is. I just don't feel right worshiping God if I'm not packing.
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Tosh
May 12, 2010 7:44 AM
It seems the smaller the penis, the lower the self esteem, the less educated, the more insecure and in fear of their world, the more he will be obsessed with the need to carry a gun.
But has anyone noticed the hypocrisy here? For instance, the Pope rides around in a bullet proof box, and now churches want to arm themselves with guns. What are they afraid of?????
Isn't the point of the 'religion' concept, to be able to go to this wonderful place called 'heaven' when you die? So why are all the religious leaders and their followers doing anything they can NOT to go?
It seems like 'Fake Faith' only works up to the point where fear takes over.
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